I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Be still, my beating vagina.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
