I got chris browned last night
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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