Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
