Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
