The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
he wants to bone in the snuggie
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
