It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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