I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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