When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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