Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
