I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize