but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Randomize
