ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
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