I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
it's like iHOP with fire
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
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