Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize
