i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
