maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
