took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
