With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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