Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
