i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize