YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize