And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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