Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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