Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
