Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
