I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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