So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
