garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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