i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
