At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
