where does the pee come out of this thing
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
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