why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
