I cockslap morals
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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