mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
