Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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