whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize