Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
