Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
