I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
You made out with two different species that night
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize