I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize