i need an iv and a liver transplant
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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