Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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