Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
