where am i from again
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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