The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
