Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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