And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
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