He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
