The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
