why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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